Half Marathon Random Thoughts (or, the one where I admit being stupid.)

Today I "did" a half marathon, that is 13.1 miles. I can't say "ran" as I only did that for about 100 feet. The rest was merely a controlled fall or just a clumsy slog. It was quite the experience, however, and writing about it in narrative form escapes me at the moment so I think another 'random thoughts' post is in order.


-Always, always be sure to see a map of the route for a half marathon (or a whole one, for that matter) BEFORE signing up. In fact, it might be smart to actually go check out the route before race day. I failed on this point and boy am I sorry now.

-There is a huge difference between a "flat half" and a full on "trail run." Ask me how I know!

-I have now used a "Porto Potty" and consumed blue Gatorade...two things I promised myself I would never, ever do.

-CLIF bars are awesome and they made a huge difference in how I was able to perform - or not die, depending on one's perspective.

-I may have suffered some sort of brain damage in this event as I could not seem to make my body do what my brain was commanding. I also may or may not have seen mushrooms that looked exactly like the ones from Super Mario Brothers and quite possibly had an out of body experience.

-I have the sense of humor of a nine year old BOY! Shoes being swallowed by icky, sticky mud, followed by the distinctly "toot-like" sound that results from freeing them caused more than a few uncontrollable bouts of laughter.

-I might have said "Jesus!" and meant it several times during this trial (or trail.) I am certain my companion did.

-I fell...in slow motion...and we died laughing.

-My new shoes are completely covered in mud. I'm not too upset about that.

-All of me hurts. Maybe even my hair.

-My precious husband pulled off the greatest surprise and was waiting for me at the finish line. He rooted me on all through training, which ate up lots of hours and he is my biggest cheerleader. I hope to return the favor someday.

-My toenails (in all of their glittery fall orange glory) are all still in their designated places and I have no blisters! These concerns caused me to lose sleep. I'm just sayin'

-I imagined I looked pretty fit and cute rocking out my running clothes and neato cool race number. Then I saw photos...I looked like Jabba the Hut in stretchy pants...with lots of mud! None will be posted upon threat of death! (OK, maybe just our feet.)

-My companion, also known as my oldest daughter, Bethany, sang lovely, made up songs about how we were so gonna do this thing the entire last two miles! She is my hero. I also considered throwing in the towel at about mile marker 11 only to realize I would still have to walk back to my car which was parked just beyond the finish line! Duh! I did not quit.

-I learned that no matter how hard you train, how prepared you are and how much you want to do something, rain followed by mud, interspersed with fallen trees, rocks, both large and small, cacti, bow hunters, snakes, cliffs and more mud, cannot ensure a quick and simple event. Life is like that, too.

-Some people find such endeavors addictive. I am not one of them. This is it! I never need to do another race of any type, ever.

-I might relax my "no bumper sticker" rule and sport a new 13.1 window cling at least...seeing as how I earned it.

-I did this to prove to myself that I could and to mark a significant anniversary of another hard thing. That my husband and children are proud of me is a really sweet added bonus.

-I came in dead last and I don't even care. I finished before the cut off time and that was my goal.

Random Thoughts

I have it on good authority that some people appreciate and even enjoy posts of this type. This is my first attempt. We'll see.

-My boss says I "internalize" things. I work in customer service. I'm not sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing. Would "externalizing" be a preferred approach? I think I might try that this week. I'll report back.

-I have heard two sermons (back to back, by two separate pastors) and read two separate books that referred to the "parable of the talents," all within the last month. I am beginning to think God might be saying something to me. I am thinking a lot about my life. How many "talents" have I received? What have I done with them? What will God say on the big day?

-I absolutely love fall. I do not, however, love man food. For the uninitiated, man food is stuff like chili, beef stew, hot wings, bratwurst, you know, meaty, greasy, heavy...well, man food. I am, however, surrounded by men as I have been blessed with four sons, two sons-in-law and one really terrific husband. They love man food. I love them. 'Nuf said.

-I have discovered Pinterest. I may be in trouble.

-I think about my Mama every day. I still miss her so much more than I ever imagined I would or could. Many days my thoughts of her bring a smile. Other days, not so much.

-On a related note...we all love reminiscing about the funny things my Mama used to say. I recall her mentioning a "wild hare" which I understood to be a wild HAIR. I pointed out the one I came to love that grew from her chin. She was not amused.

-On a still related but slightly different note...I regret giggling at the bearded and mustached lunch ladies I encountered in school cafeterias. I regret it and I repent. Because what goes around comes around, judge not lest ye be judged or Karma is a b****. Whatever your persuasion or belief system, never laugh at something you don't want to come home to roost. Consider yourself warned. That's all I'm gonna say about that.

-I taught nearly all of my kids to drive. I taught some of them to drive in a Ford E350 15 passenger van. They can drive anything. It is one of my prouder accomplishments.

-I have been training for about 10 weeks for a half marathon I plan to undertake on Saturday. I saw what I think is the route. I think I might be scared now. I wonder why I thought this was a good idea.

-I hate being accosted by the people hawking their wares from the kiosks at the mall. I really hate it.

-I grew up very poor. Our first years decades of marriage were also pretty lean. Two things will always mark affluence to me because they were the first to go when the money was tight on grocery day. They are fabric softener and Ziploc bags. I am thrilled to have both in my possession at the moment. I never stop thanking God for His blessings to us. Especially little things like zippie bags and soft clothes. I hope I never do.

-While I do not love man food and I really don't care for football, there is just nothing like the comforting drone of football on the TV on a lazy Sunday afternoon. My hubby lounges on the couch in his church clothes (minus the dress shirt, since he just ate chili.) It just means fall, and life is good.

Like water...

Some things are just better than others. We don't live in a world that acknowledges that consistantly. Sure we elevate lots of silly things to the "best" category. Electronic devices, movies, songs, singers, actors, cars, athletes...you name it. But principles or concepts? Anything goes there. Whatever floats your boat or works for you and yours, that's the best. We are to be tolerant and open minded and avoid assigning any particular value to life choices. I have thought a lot about this over the last couple of days. Maybe it's the political climate swirling around. Maybe it's something else entirely. This is what I think. If I love stuff, money, what others think of me and give my life to obtaining that over, say, what God thinks of me and cultivating contentment and a deep abiding relationship with Him, then that isn't good. Even if I say it is. If I put myself first and overlook, neglect or assign a lower place to the needs of those around me, whether they are mine or not, then that isn't good. Even if I say it is. If I use my time as I wish without thinking of the eternal significance of that time and say that is good, it doesn't make it so. If I use people to get what I want, accolades, financial gain, power or even vacations, that's not good. Even if I think it is. What in my life do I think is good that God says is not? Have I spent my days on things that really are the best, that matter, the eternal things, or should I have chosen another path?

One time several years ago I was asking some of these same questions and a sweet friend looked across the lunch table at me with tears welling in her eyes. She reminded me that I chose the life I was living and that it was a hard choice. Then, right there in Macaroni Grill, she picked up my water glass and poured it out on the table! Every.last.drop! She reminded me that my life was best spent "Like water spilled on the ground, which cannot be recovered...(2 Sam14:14) and that I was doing that every day, as unto the LORD. Most days I feel that way

                    but

                                    not

                                                        this

                                                                               day.....on      this       
                                                                                                                   day.... 

                                                                                                                               I

                                                                                                                     wonder if I

                                                                                                                             should

                                                                                                                                    have

                                                                                                                                    been an

                                                                                                                                          astronaut.